Unpredictable, Irresistible You

I can't even begin to tell you how I am feeling today. The only word that comes up for me is 'doubt.' I am in doubt, I guess. I even doubt that.

The one thing that I do know is how completely unpredictable everything seems to be these days. Yes, we are changing. Yes, the world is changing. So, ride it. Just accept it. Don't try to figure it out.

It is irresistible in the sense that we cannot stop it and we cannot get off of this particular amusement park ride. It's the Hall of Mirrors and the Roller Coaster and the Haunted House all at once.

It feels incomprehensible to me. And I love to understand things. Well, I don't understand this. It is just happening. It just is.

I hope I'm not shocking you - after all, I've always had something to say here that made at least some kind of sense. And I'd love to help. But right now, I can only be who and what I am. And I am confused.

So, accept it, Lu. Just be with it. Everything is changing so much lately, so quickly that I assume this doubt, this not knowing, will also pass. Right now, I'm just going to accept that I don't know. I'm being asked to trust even so. Even so.

I had the most amazing conversation with my higher self last evening, and with the one some call Sananda also. It helped and yet, I'm still sort of floundering in my sense of not knowing. I'm going to trust this too. I felt the love and support from my higher self and from Sananda that I have come to expect, and to rely on, frankly. We're not alone, although sometimes it seems that way. I think that I am being asked to move with trust through the doubt, as paradoxical as that might sound. I'm being asked to meet the doubt and the not knowing with trust.

So, that is what I am doing and it feels right. It feels like an answer that is the answer for me right now.

This process is unpredictable. What used to take months, takes hours. And it is unstoppable, irresistible. Having come this far, we can't go back.

It is good to have companions on the journey, and that is why I share my thoughts and feelings with you here. And I choose very very strongly to be of service in some way, so I hope that this blog does help. Maybe not today (smile) but usually.

Unpredictable and not altogether comfortable or easy, but I'm going to trust it. I've decided on that, at least.